How To Be A Pedestrian

You would think people knew how to walk on a pavement, but apparently not so this has to be written.

· Do not walk in the cycle path. Whether you’re on a pavement which has a cycle path integrated into the middle of it, or whether you stupidly decide to walk on the cycle path at the side of the road: don’t do it. Are you a bike? Do you have wheels? Then get out of the fucking cycle lane before I run you over.

· Walk at the side of the path. It’s all very well to absently trundle along in the middle of the path if you’ve go nothing better to do, but some people do have things to do and need to get past you. Please walk to one side of the path, it makes it a lot easier for cyclists, and also for people who walk faster than you.

· Don’t walk in a row. I can accept that it would break your heart to be torn away from the side of your 16 friends for a few minutes, but if you would be so kind as to move to the side slightly when you see a bike coming along. You are not the Jackson 5, you don’t need to stand in a row.

· Don’t assume there’s a cycle path. There’s not always a cycle path. If there were cycle paths which didn’t involve risking limbs I’m sure they would be used more. Maybe if all the pedestrians weren’t scattered across the pavement and in the cycle path, there would be more room for bikes.

· Don’t smugly rev at cyclists as you zoom past. Yes, cars go faster than bikes. Well done for noticing that. It might be due to the environment-polluting engine you’ve got there.

· Don’t be offended when they use their bell. It’s not personal dear, you’re just in the way.