Fun

Fun is a funny thing. Well, actually not it isn’t. Fun, much like sex, is a depressing topic when you’re not getting any.

That’s not to say I’m not having any fun. I’m having as much fun as I think is possible at my current state. Fun is subjective. What some people find fun I might think is pretty damn boring. I find fun in small things that amuse me during the day, stupid little things like singing along to the hold music at work (e.g. George Michael – Fast Love), putting elastic bands in people's coffee or throwing paperclips at people sat in front of me.

In my opinion, the best way to be is to be socially acceptable in front of 90% of people, but always have those 10% of people that you can act like a complete moron in front of.

Fun changes as you get older. I have to say it, but we're not as young as we used to be, we're not as easily amused. It's not like we can run around and lift up peoples skirts for fun anymore - laws apply to us now. The more intelligent you become, the harder it becomes to have fun: things are expected of you. The trick is not to give a flying monkeys arse and to do what you want anyway - just as long as no one sees it except your 10%-ers.

Alternatively, have fun in front of everyone. This may result in being institutionalised, however. It's a ridiculous truth of our society that the self we project in public is often a watered-down version of how we truly are.

Fun is something you have to make yourself. You can’t just go somewhere and automatically have fun: it’s all about your attitude. If you’re not having fun it’s because you’re either not looking at things from the right perspective, or you’re at a funeral. Which is very ironic, because you can’t spell funeral without ‘fun’.

I would like my funeral to be fun, while we’re on the subject. Everyone will dance the hokey-cokey. Or else.