Sunday, 13 June 2010


‘Signs’ is a really awful film. Mel Gibson makes me want to eat my own face... in a bad way.

Does Mel Gibson hate Jews, or did I just make that up? Maybe he’s Jewish. Maybe He’s masochistic and Jewish, that would explain both. I don’t find him attractive or charming, so that’s persuasive evidence that he’s definitely not Jewish. Also, I just looked it up on ‘Jew Or Not’, a website I find myself spending increasing amounts of time on lately. He's not. Quite the opposite, it would seem...

Usually on ‘Jew Or Not’ it has the person’s name, then has a few paragraphs explaining them and their relation to the religion, etc. Sometimes it’s complicated, sometimes people have weird parentage or took up Judaism or are too lazy to practice, or are not Jewish but just really love bagels. On Mel Gibson’s page, it just says a massive, emphatic, ‘NO’. So… he’s not, then? Ok.

Someone once told me that a glass of water is known as a ‘Jewish cocktail’. It was probably Mel Gibson actually, thinking about it. Twat. That’s pretty harsh though – just water? Where’s the orange squash at least? And yes, of course you can make orange squash in a cocktail shaker… the real question is why wouldn’t you?

No comments: