Saturday, 17 October 2009


I was considering Halloween costumes (it’s only 2 weeks away!) and I the only conclusion I came to was that I’m a transvestite.

All the good costumes are men. Fo shiz.

If you’re a girl you’ve got a handful of choices, all of which involve 90% nudity. Don’t get me wrong, I’m no prude, but there’s a possibility that I will be working in the perviest pub in town whilst wearing this costume, so I need to be as covered as possible. In fact, I might go as a nun.

To give myself some ideas and to remind myself of what I like, I took to my facebook and itunes. I know – sad isn’t it? Most people I like I have already dressed as. The remaining idols are a bit more tricky…

Woody Allen - … is a man.
Iggy Pop – Would fundamentally involve being topless.
Lou Reed - … is a man.
Ringo Starr - … is a man.
Jim Morrisson – Would fundamentally involve being topless.
Freddie Mercury - … is a man.
Jack the Ripper – …was a vagina mangler, and do I really need the hassle?

Everyone else I could think of was just basically stupid. I don’t want to have to explain to idiots who I’m dressed up as – you should know who Siouxie Sioux is, dickhead!

If I completely run out of ideas, I'm going as Edie Sedgwick, and no one can stop me!! ... Oh wait... That would involve being topless.

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