I consider myself a feminist - of course I do. I think any modern woman (and the majority of men) would be wrong if they said that they weren’t. I’m proud to say that I’m a feminist – and you should be too. However…
I knit and sew. I love to cook and bake. I have been known to do the odd cross-stitch. I am in love with Laura Ashley and Cath Kidson. I squeal with joy when I see a kitten, puppy, or baby of any kind. I wear a lot of bows, rarely leave the house without makeup on, and see myself as very maternal.
The question I’m asking is: Can a feminist be feminine? A true feminist? It seems a ridiculous question. It almost seems logical to say that yes, of course a feminist should be feminine, surely that’s a prerequisite? You have to be what you are supporting. Really? A florist isn't floral. Ok, bad example.
I think this naturally depends on your definition of feminism. Obviously not wanting to go all 'sociology' on you, there's a spectrum of feminism. This ranges from the concept of women-only societies, to the more liberal, modern feminism that most of us think of."Feminism is the radical idea that women are people" just doesn't go far enough. Personally, I like to keep it simple and say that feminism is complete equality between the genders. Anything a man can do, a woman can do - and vice versa. This means is both terms of the law, language, (which affects...) cultural expectations and perceptions, etc.
Yes, I know, there are things that men and women are physically incapable of doing due to physiology. That's why I said 'gender', not 'sex', smart-arse. Holy ovaries! I know men aren't about to go popping out babies anytime soon. Bastards.
I like cooking and knitting, etc. and I'm good at it. Generally speaking, we enjoy doing things that we are good at. So the cycle of reinforcing feminine actions goes on, and on. But I don't mind, as long as it's an option. If I liked playing football, or hitting people, or watching South Park or whatever testosterone spurs you to do, then I'd feel free to do that.
If I were at any point to become a housewife, then I wouldn't see that as a surrender to patriarchy or whatever you want to call it. It's only a pathetic position to be in if there's no choice or escape. I have been provided a life so far which means that I am capable of doing whatever job I want to (within reason - more on this later, by the way) regardless of my gender. If someone chooses a traditional, household-based job then that's their choice, but they could equally be a physicist, an aerobics instructor, a grave-digger, etc. I'm all for househusbands too by the way, if that's your bag. I would like to change the title to 'housespouse' however, as it is non-gender specific, and is a lot more fun to say.
Even if I am overtly feminine, and make feminine choices, the very fact that I am making the choices is what makes me a feminist. I am, and will be, what I want to be, not what I feel I should be. I have the right to a choice. That's what feminism is; the choice to be whatever you want... and if that includes a trip to Laura Ashley to buy a floral apron, well then, why the fuck not?
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