Vampire Sunshine

Why don't you...

go out in the sunshine?

... ever seen a vampire with skin cancer? ... exactly.

OverUnder

Why don't you...

underestimate me?

...because I love how it scares the shit out of you.

Bridgey

Why don't you...

Cry me river, build me a bridge, and then set up a toll booth

... because it looks like a fun job.

Library Trousers

Why don't you...

Have any trousers on?

I'm sure that's not normal in a library.

Snifter

Why don't you...

Have a snifter of gin?

... or alternatively, start referring to measurements of alcohol as 'snifters'.

Kettle Surprise

Why don't you...

Put the kettle on

...?

Because surprise tea is the best kind of tea.

Bloliday

Why don't you...

Blog!

... because no one's been blogging lately! It seems you think as if you're all on holiday or something...

Trews

Why don't you...

answer the next question you are asked with, "No, it's just the way my trousers hang"

...?

Welles I Never

Why don't you...

admit that a young Orson Welles was attractive?

... just a teensy bit?

Bedtime

Why don't you...

Go to bed!

... Father Christmas doesn't come if you're awake!!

Essay Time

Why don't you...

Hand in that essay?

...it's due in today!

And congratumalations to all the clever people who have handed in work recently! You all deserve a nice rest!

Beep Reverse Beep

Why don't you...

reverse around a corner?

...because no one ever does after they pass their test!

Happy Birthday Blog!

Hooray again! It's www.harharbonk.blogspot.com's birthday today! (Except it was yesterday but I haven't gone to sleep yet so it still counts... I've been very busy busy working working working!)

That's right it's been a whole year of ridiculousness and telling people things they didn't want to know or even need to know! Good times!

To commemorate this momentous occasion, I thought it would be nice to remind everyone how awesome I am. So here is my top 10 blog posts from the last year:

Wellies

How To Be Nice

Naa-Mez

How To Fly Long-Haul

The Ballard Of The Mallard

37

Top 10 Ambiguous Songs

Top 10 90s Songs

No Such Thing

Oh...!

I say that, but there may be other ones. These are the ones I can see from quickly looking through the titles, but I don't know. It's sort of like choosing a favourite mole, they're all pretty rubbish and ugly and might end up killing you one day. Bad analogy alert.

Any ideas what ones should be in the top 10? I may change my list.

Eat My Shortcakes

Why don't you...

take a long walk off a shortcake?

...I suppose they're a bit crumbly, aren't they?

Bloggery Reasoning

Why don't you...

Write a blog?

...I can't seem to find a reason not to!

Merry Unbirthday

Why don't you...

celebrate your unbirthday?

If it's not your birthday today, that is.

I like this picture because it's grammatically correct. The very best kind of graffiti, I'd say!

Gnome Conversations

Why don't you...

...Talk to a garden gnome?

They must get terribly lonely out in the garden on their own!

Annoying Monkey

Why don't you...

Watch the Olympics?

... because the annoying advert monkey isn't actually real! (As far as I know)

Sleepy Time

Why don't you...

go to bed?

It's far too late to be awake! It's sleepy time!

And if you've just woke up... go back to bed!

Wet Shoes

Why don't you...

Take your shoes off, and throw them in the lake?

...you'll be two steps on the water!